For those of you that didn’t read The Great Outdoors post, first of all, shame on you. Where the hell have you been? And second, to catch you up, it was an in-depth analysis on my feelings towards the outdoors. This is Part 2 of those feelings.
My dislike for nature stems from my childhood. Ha, but no really. My mom loves the outdoors! As a kid she made me go hiking and camping and all that stuff that includes trees and dirt. And I hated it. Ok, I liked the s’mores part and…..yea, that’s the only thing coming to me right now.
Anyway I have funnily enough, as I have become an adult, decided that I prefer to not pee in the woods or sleep on rock hard dirt. And over the years I have decided that walking in the woods with creatures all around me is not my idea of a good time. I know, I know, but it’s so beautiful and peaceful in nature. Breathe in the fresh air and have a picnic on the grass. That’s all dandy until the fresh air you suck in has some kind bug that is now stuck in your throat and that grass is filled with ants that are now all over your food. No, thank you.
As you may have noticed in my pictures, Scotland is quite beautiful and green. It really is pretty and I appreciate that. I really appreciate it most from a car or train, but sometimes I venture out for a walk. The other day Scott and I went for a walk on the beach, which we have done many times. The beach I don’t officially qualify as nature. It’s different. Anyway, this day the tide was up and didn’t leave much room for a leisurely stroll. So Scott suggested a trail up a hill that goes along the coast. It was breathtaking.
That’s the town skyline in the background and the East Sands.
There was a good size trail for about 10 minutes. Plenty of space for me to stretch out and I could see what was around me. No place for anything to hide and jump out at me. Then we came to a route that led to a lower trail down to the beach. It seemed like a good idea to head towards the shore and we started down the path.
Slowly the trail started to creep in and I couldn’t see the path in front of me. The grass was growing around me. I started to panic. I told Scott I wanted to turn around. But turning around meant going back by myself, because Scott wanted to keep going. So I tried my best to suck it up and by that I mean I shrieked and hollered for the rest of the trail.
Then we came to a spot where I had to jump over some mud. I was not happy about this. Scott grabbed my arm to help me, but instead of going over the mud I landed right in the middle of it and rolled into the bushes. Yes, rolled INTO the bushes that were slanting downwards towards my death. No, I am not dramatic.
At this point shrieking turned into a full blown meltdown. I scrambled to get up and not only realized I was covered in mud, but suddenly felt a stinging sensation going up my arm and hand. I had apparently landed in a patch of stinging nettles. Don’t know what that it is? Neither did I. But I gathered it was nature’s way of telling me to never go outside again.
That’s my arm shortly after we made it to a clearing. I was sobbing while Scott told me to stand still so he could take a picture of my arm. Priorities. My wonderful hubby tried to console me while also laughing at me. I sat down on a rock in a huff (after carefully examining what could be near it that could harm me) and continued my tantrum of hating the outdoors and Scotland. Because it was Scotland’s fault this had happened to me, of course.
After several minutes of hysterics (Scott at this point decided to go down to the shore and leave me to it) some dude came walking along and either was completely unaware or decided to avoid the fact that he had come across some woman covered in mud, a rash and tears flowing down her face. Instead he said excuse me so he could step on the rock I was sitting on and slowly climbed up the rock formation behind me. Perspective set in.
I decided it was time to walk back up the trail, that had led me on this horrific adventure, and get on with it. At the top I sat down on a bench and did my best to take in the view and calm down. I was going to be ok. Life would go on. Scott then took this opportunity and asked if I wanted to hike up the next trail. (Enter mean Ashley face here). We went home.
Thank goodness I got some beautiful images because that was probably the last time I will ever see it. 🙂
And how is my arm now? Thank you so much for asking. It still has some spots, but the stinging finally stopped after a couple of days. My manicure, on the other hand, was not so fortunate.
Since I can’t go outside anymore I have been trying to get into British television. The other night this was on TV. The World Bagpiping Championship. I leave you with that.